Do you ever feel like the day’s already over before it even begins? Just getting through basic tasks—waking up, taking care of hygiene, meals, and then, of course, more substantial responsibilities like work, school, or projects—can feel like a marathon when there’s so little time. Finding time to unwind, making room for passions, or simply relaxing often feels like a luxury out of reach. For trauma survivors, this everyday overload isn’t just challenging; it can be all-consuming.
As someone who grew up with procrastination and sleep struggles, I know this challenge firsthand. Even now, as an adult, I find myself struggling to catch up, battling a habit of waiting until the last minute. And while I’ve developed a sleep ritual that sometimes helps, I still learn the hard way the importance of proactive habits.
So, what does the literature say about these struggles? And how can we, as trauma survivors, navigate a path forward? Let’s dive in.
The Weight of Trauma on Daily Tasks
Trauma has a profound effect on how we interact with daily tasks. In her work, author bell hooks explored how trauma and oppression shape people’s lives in deep, everyday ways. Trauma doesn’t just leave emotional scars; it can alter the brain’s functioning, particularly in the areas related to planning, task initiation, and emotional regulation. For many, these impacts can translate into procrastination, fatigue, and a sense of being “stuck.”
Psychologist Resmaa Menakem expands on this by discussing how people affected by generational and racial trauma often find their body’s stress responses triggered by daily tasks. These stress responses, ingrained over time, can make routine activities feel exhausting.
Understanding these root causes helps us recognize that the overwhelm many of us feel is not just about time management; it’s about rewiring patterns deeply embedded in our minds and bodies.
Breaking the Cycle: Trauma-Informed Strategies for Managing Daily Tasks
Breaking out of reactive habits and moving toward a proactive approach can be transformative. Here are some strategies rooted in trauma-informed care to make that transition easier.
1. Embrace a Proactive Mindset Over a Reactive One
Trauma can create a reactive mindset—where we feel constantly on edge, responding to each task as if it’s a sudden emergency. Shifting toward a proactive mindset, however, helps us take charge of our time rather than feeling that time is chasing us.
Example:
Try planning your week on a Sunday night, even if it’s just sketching out the big goals. Focus on the two or three most important things each day, rather than trying to tackle everything at once. I’ve found that even writing down one small priority for the morning can make the day feel more manageable.
2. Develop a Sleep Ritual That Sticks
Sleep is vital for trauma recovery, yet trauma survivors often struggle with rest. Creating a consistent, calming sleep ritual can help signal to your body that it’s safe to wind down.
Example:
In my own experience, I’ve developed a simple sleep ritual: dim lighting, no screens for 30 minutes before bed, and a few deep breaths. It doesn’t always guarantee perfect sleep, but over time, it’s helped me ease into a restful mindset. Small adjustments—like adding a warm drink or listening to gentle sounds—can make a difference in solidifying the habit.
3. Tackle Tasks with Micro-Steps
Large tasks can feel paralyzing. Breaking them into “micro-tasks”—small, bite-sized steps—can make them more approachable and boost confidence.
Example:
If you’re putting off a big project, set a timer for just five minutes to start. You may only get through the first step, but completing even a small part can help you feel a sense of progress. For example, I often tell myself I’ll spend “just five minutes” cleaning, and I often end up doing more simply because I’ve eased myself into it.
4. Prioritize and Simplify
One key to managing overwhelm is simplifying your day. For trauma survivors, this can mean choosing a few meaningful tasks rather than trying to check every box on an endless to-do list.
Example:
Choose a core task for each day—a work goal, self-care activity, or one meaningful personal project. Then, let other things be secondary. For example, if I plan to write for an hour in the morning, I don’t expect myself to also tackle a huge list of unrelated tasks afterward. Allowing one “main event” each day can help conserve mental energy.
5. Build Gentle Accountability
Accountability can motivate us to complete tasks, but it needs to be gentle, encouraging rather than strict.
Example:
Find an accountability partner—maybe a friend or family member—and set a weekly check-in. It doesn’t have to be about intense goals; sometimes, simply sharing small wins or discussing what didn’t work can provide support. For instance, I have a friend who checks in with me once a week about my personal projects, and knowing I’ll talk to them helps me keep up with my goals.
6. Practice Self-Compassion and Flexibility
Healing isn’t a straight path, and setbacks are natural. Building flexibility and self-compassion into your routine allows for recovery when things don’t go as planned.
Example:
If I have a day where I don’t sleep well and my routine falls apart, I remind myself that healing is a process. Giving myself permission to start fresh the next day without self-blame allows me to keep going. Even something as simple as a quick, mindful stretch in the morning can act as a reset.
Moving Forward: Small Changes, Big Impacts
Managing life’s daily tasks as a trauma survivor is no easy feat. But it’s important to remember that small, steady steps are key to creating sustainable habits. By setting small priorities, practicing self-compassion, and giving ourselves permission to adapt, we can learn to create lives that feel less overwhelming and more aligned with our needs.
As bell hooks said, “Healing is an act of communion.” We owe it to ourselves to build routines that respect our journey and honor our resilience.